Birthday Cards
Celebrate the big day with a humorous or somewhat snarky birthday card. A collection of fire farting skunks to sugary cupcakes... we've got just the right card for the birthday gal or guy. 
Info:
Birthday card, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front features a navy blue illustration of a mad scientist, digitally cut and stitched, holding a beaker with the message: "You're still alive! Iconic. Happy B-Day." The background is filled with bold yellow lightning bolts for maximum dramatic effect.
Website Product Description:
For the Friend Who Does the Most — and Somehow Survives
You know the one. The friend who makes questionable decisions, lives life at full volume, and somehow keeps going. This card is for them. Equal parts sarcastic and celebratory, Iconic says exactly what everyone's thinking but no one has the nerve to put on a card.
With a retro 70s–90s vibe and a digitally cut-and-stitched navy blue mad scientist front and center, this card is a love letter to the chaotic, the bold, and the gloriously unhinged. Bonus points if they're a sucker for retro aesthetics.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
Iconic
Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Birthday card, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front features a bold halftone hand holding a sprinkle cupcake with a birthday candle, set against a bright yellow-orange background covered in cartoon cats. The greeting reads: “Happy Birthday, Mother F**ker.” Collage-style design with maximum personality.
⚠️ Mature content. Intended for adults only.
Website Product Description:
For Adults Only — Say What Everyone’s Actually Thinking
Skip the sentimental verse. This bold, collage-style birthday card gets straight to the point — and your recipient will love you for it. Whether it’s your best friend, a sibling, or that coworker with an excellent sense of humor, this card delivers the birthday message they actually deserve.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
Happy Birthday, Motherf**er
Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Birthday card, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front features a bold graphic of an angry skunk paired with a hand-drawn fire explosion, set against a bright yellow-orange background. The message reads: “Happy Birthday! To You! You Kinda Suck, BTW.” Collage-style design with serious attitude.
Website Product Description:
The Card That Says It Like It Is
Straight from the mind of a 17-year-old with impeccable comedic instincts — this card is for the friend who can take a joke and dish one right back. Bold, sarcastic, and just the right amount of rude, You Kinda Suck, BTW is the birthday card for people who are over the generic stuff.
Perfect for a best friend, sibling, or that coworker who definitely doesn’t take life too personally.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
You Kinda Suck, BTW
Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Birthday, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front features a bold collage-style design of a woman behind jail bars, holding a wine bottle and a cocktail, with the message: "Congrats! You survived another year without being arrested." Bring, chaotic, and perfectly on-brand for that one friend.
Website Product Description:
For the friend you’re honestly surprised is still a free citizen
You know the one. The friend who parties a little too hard, drinks a little too much, and somehow keeps getting away with it. This card is your annual acknowledgment of their miraculous freedom – and a gentle wish that their luck holds out one more year.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
You’re Lucky (Arrested)
Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Birthday, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front features a gleefully reckless guy riding a shopping cart in a bike helmet with his hands in the air, set against a bold blue floral background. The message reads: “Happy Birthday. I’m honestly surprised ‘survival of the fittest’ hasn’t kicked in yet.” Collage-style design with maximum chaotic energy.
Website Product Description:
For the Friend Who Defies All Logic — and Keeps Getting Away With It
Every group has one. The person who does the dumbest things, somehow lacks basic common sense, and yet miraculously survives another year. This card is Darwin’s way of saying happy birthday.
Whether they’re your best friend, a family member, or that coworker who makes you question everything, this card says what you’ve all been thinking: it’s genuinely impressive they’ve made it this far.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
Survival of the Fittest
Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Birthday card, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front features a toddler mid-tantrum on a living room rug, paired with the words: "No matter how old you get, I'll always remember when you couldn't find your shoes." The design has a fun 90s vibe — perfect for kids born in the 80s or 90s — with a warm background and playful little monster faces scattered throughout.
Website Product Description:
Because some things never change
No matter how old they get, moms always remember the little things — like that one time they couldn't find their shoes. This funny, heartfelt birthday card is made for moms who want to say "Happy Birthday" with a side of nostalgia and a whole lot of love.
Perfect for sons of any age, this card blends humor, warmth, and just the right amount of "I told you so" energy — without being overly sentimental.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
Lost Your Shoes
Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Wildcard/Friendship, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
The front of this card features a vintage image of four women lounging atop a rock, looking badass. The front message says, “You're a Bad Bitch. Sometimes an ordinary one... mostly bad." The background is bold, colorful flowers.
Website Product Description:
For all the boss babes and badass women.
For all the bad bitch best friends and independent women you know, this positive, inspiring, irreverent, encouraging, and slightly offensive card should be on your snail mail to-give list. This greeting card could be great for a birthday, job promotion, graduation, convocation, or just because! Treat those around you with a mailbox treat.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
Bad Bitch
Wildcard/Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Wildcard/Birthday/Everyday, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
Features a laid-back gorilla in oversized novelty sunglasses, living his best life against a bold green background scattered with turquoise leaves. Collage-style design with maximum personality and minimum apology.
Website Product Description:
For the Friend Who Has a Certain... Energy
You know exactly who this card is for. The one who moves through life completely unbothered, unapologetically themselves, and somehow makes it all look effortless. This card doesn’t need much explanation — the front says it all.
“Saw this. Thought of you. It just fits.”
Whether you’re celebrating a birthday, sending a just-because laugh, or simply acknowledging that their chaotic good energy is one of your favorite things about them — this card delivers equal parts absurdity, affection, and zero judgment.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: Blank — for your own awesome, witty message
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 7×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
It Just Fits
Wildcard/Birthday
$3.00/e
Info:
Birthday card, $3.00/each, 6-pack ($18.00 total)
Features a bold line-art illustration of a man in a white shirt and black pants wearing a polka-dot party hat, covering his face with both hands in mortified embarrassment, while a security camera on a pole points directly at him — all set against a vivid red background absolutely covered in floating cartoon eyeballs staring in every direction. Chunky cream bubble typography at the top reads: “Happy Flocking Birthday!” Inside says “I see you :).”
Website Product Description:
Some Birthdays Deserve a Heartfelt Message. Others Deserve to Acknowledge the Surveillance
Yes, we are apparently living under constant surveillance now. And honestly? Someone should acknowledge that on your birthday. This card does exactly that — a little dark, a little absurd, and very much for the person who appreciates humor about modern life without needing a political lecture attached.
Open it up for the perfectly unsettling follow-up: “I see you.”
Perfect for husbands, brothers, dads, friends, coworkers, or your favorite conspiracy-curious birthday boy. Send it to the guy who will read it, laugh uncomfortably, and immediately look up at the nearest camera.
Specifications:
Size: A7 folded greeting card (5" x 7")
Paper: 110lb / 300gsm smooth white cardstock
Eco-friendly: Acid and lignin free
Envelope: A7 plain brown kraft square flap envelope (5.25" x 7.25") included
Packaging: Card, envelope enclosed in clear cello sleeve for protection and presentation
Inside: I see you :)
Shipping & Turnaround Time:
USPS Ground Advantage, 8×6×2 literature mailer (shipped together with minimum order). Wholesale orders generally ship within 3-5 days.
Happy Flocking Birthday
Birthday
$3.00/e
Crafted in Texas. Designed by Humans.
We're not here to blend in. In a world flooded with generic, AI-generated designs, we’re taking a stand for creativity that actually means something. Born and based in Texas, our company is fueled by human hands, sharp minds, and a relentless eye for detail. Every piece we create is original, intentional, and built to last — because good design shouldn't be soulless. Welcome to a brand that gives a damn.
